Jessica Hopper sent out a call for stories of women's experiences in the music industry. Thousands of replies revealed something familiar to many of us, but deeply disturbing nonetheless: The music industry's systemic sexism and misogyny. When Hopper spoke at the BigSound conference in Australia, she did more than call out the scene—and the people who drive it—on its failures. She came up with a roadmap for all men who want to make the world a better place for the women they work with. Some details are more music-specific than others, but Hopper gives crucial advice for allies across the board:

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•  Witness what is happening around you. Witness what women are up against.

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•  Ask the women you know about their experiences making music, performing music and attending shows.

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•  Listen to their answers, meaning: don’t excuse someone’s behavior by saying, “But he’s a really good guy”, or “that doesn’t sound like him” or “you’re taking something personally.” Or “maybe you misunderstood that”. “Maybe it was just a joke.” “Oh, he has a weird sense of humor.” Or worst case...”Well, what did you expect?” Which is basically saying: this is a man’s world and we play by particular rules.

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•  Here’s the most important part of all of this: When women tell you what their experiences are, believe them. Don’t qualify that belief. Just believe them.

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Some rough suggestions:

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. •  When you’re on a conference call and some dude is talking over the woman who is speaking, you can interrupt him, and say, “Hey hold that thought for a minute. I want to hear what she’s saying.”

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. •  You can cosign a woman’s idea on an email thread...as we know from an interview with Bjork, sometimes you have to sya things over and over and over again. there is a lesser value on women’s opinions and communication.

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. •  Accept women’s expertise. Hire female sound engineers in your club.

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. •  Post signs in your venue that there is a zero tolerance policy for harassment, and then actually follow it up.

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. •  Include sexual assault and prevention in training for all security staff.

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. •  If you know a guy in your scene who has a skeezy rep, and maybe you know women who don’t want to work with him, ask women what the deal is with that guy. Even if it’s inconvenient.

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. •  Don't invite Chris Brown to play at your Grammys. Or R.Kelly to do a cameo on your album.

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•  And here’s a really basic thing you can do: Call out other dudes when they’re being shitty. Because lots of times they’re not going to listen to us. We know that. But lots of times dudes listen to other dudes. Especially if you’re a dude with power; someone who can help their career.

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•  But most importantly, don’t make us carry this burden alone. Because when all of this happens to us, when we exist in an environment, where there’s a low level casual sexism or misogyny, when we’re told what’s happening to us isn’t relaly happening (and if it is? Please don’t talk about it.)the most important thing we can do is have this recognized, have it seen by other people who are in a position to help it stop.

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