rebecca says:

Here’s a quote from an open letter from Angie Aker to her son, which you can read the rest of here:

“…because not enough kids get a roadmap, I’m going to give you one.
Here’s how you can rule out sleeping with someone:

1. She’s hammered.

2. She seems unsure if she wants to (you should never have to talk anyone into it).

3. She’s passed out.

4. It seems like there’s any other reason she might regret it in the morning. (Even if it’s not rape, do you really want to be someone’s morning-after regret, when instead they can remember you as a total gentleman?)

Here’s how you can be sure it’s okay to proceed with sex:

1. She is in control of her faculties.

2. She is enthusiastically willing.

3. Check in with her! “Do you want to be doing this?” is a great thing to ask when things are going to another sexual level. The worst thing that will happen is she’ll rethink it and say, no, she’s actually not ready. It’s important at that point to pivot to doing something else together, and not make her feel guilty for changing her mind. While that may feel like a bummer to you in the moment, what you’ve just achieved there is fucking badass. You’ve just put someone else’s feelings ahead of your physiological needs. You’ve just treated somebody the way you hope another guy would treat your sister.”

—

Why can’t we all get comfortable talking to our kids about consent as a regular part of sexual education? I agree that wits are important for everyone. But it sucks that it becomes the girl’s responsibility to protect herself because it is assumed the boy can’t control himself. Here’s to educating our boys so our girls can enjoy the same freedoms they do.